No More Rants (I Promise)

Okay--maybe I needed to just post my issues to get them out of the way in my head and heart, or maybe the material in the next three chapters is just better (for me), but either way I thought this section was much much better.

I really enjoyed "Romanced," as I noted in my comment to Em earlier, this was eye-opening to me in light of now knowing what it's like to be in a romantic relationship with someone, me personally, not me theoretically. Knowing the God is there as the Perfect Lover who always has the right answer, responds appropriately, can't be dissuaded from loving me is awesome (in the awe inspiring sense of the word). I like how they describe the passion of pursuing this relationship, sometimes I'm frightened to be committed and passionate about something because it might be silly or not worth while. But knowing God intimately will never be those things. "To pursue intimacy with Christ, you will have to fight for it. [...] You'll need to fight the Thief that would steal your Lover's gifts to you outright. That's okay. There is a fierceness in women that was given to us for a purpose. Getting time with your Lover is worth whatever it costs." (126)

"Beauty to Unveil" and "Arousing Adam" did seem to go hand in hand to me (as they note in 9 "We'll bet you were thinking about the man in your life through most of the last chapter"). The idea of being vulnerable and "unveiling [my] feminine heart" (147) is a terrifying thought in some regards because I do not like to be vulnerable, but exciting in other regards because I feel encouraged that I should be trying to be open, vulnerable, and arousing (obviously within the limits of appropriateness)--that it's worth it to try and if it's not worth the risk, than it's not worth my time.

Catching up...

This book overwhelms me.  I mean, to talk in decent detail about each chapter or three chapters is intimidating.  But to not do it, would be sad, cause it's so good.  I'm not sure any of the following will make a whole lot of sense, so I apologize ahead of time.

Romanced (7): It's only of late that I am truly beginning to appreciate God's love letters to me.  I mean, I'm not sure I always loved trees like i do now...but do I love them.  All different kinds, the tall skinny ones in Germany, the ancient gnarled ones in England, the huge Redwoods in CA.  When I walk in woods, I am so happy.  That's a love letter.  Far more poetic than Keats.  :)  This whole idea fills me with such warm fuzzies.  For lack of a better term.  

It's funny how many women/girls want romance.  They may want it to manifest itself in different ways (a book instead of flowers), but we all want it on some level.  And to know that God wants that too, from me, seems impossible.  I've always had a hard time seeing Jesus/ God as lover.  That he was my lover.  Talk about seeming sacrilegious. But I like it.  I mean, I get that it's never a physical relationship.  He's God and all, but that if I truly desire the affection, he'll provide it through others or teach me to grow without it.  That's very comforting.  

For the first time, this year in general, I'm okay with just being romanced by God.  As I learn to be content in that (which will take a lot more time), I'm excited about just being content with him.  It'll make my life so much better if I can be complete in him.  And if I can finally realize that.

Beauty to Unveil (8):  man, I love this stuff.  Offering my uniqueness, my heart, my 'beauty,' sounds so awesome.  Scary, sure, but that I have something to offer and that God wants me to offer, is just so cool.  To be vulnerable (in situations that warrant it) is something I do too often and often come out ashamed of my honesty and disclosure.  So, for me it's not being vulnerable, but discerning when to and when not to.  hmm.  

Willing to Suffer.  pg. 143.  Very scary.  Taking up the cross and suffering.  That really scares me.  I can't say that I desire to suffer.  Who does?  But I want to if it means that I'm going about this right.  So, if to be truly beautiful, I need to suffer, I desire that.  I say that and i feel like I'm about to be smote with lightning, but I guess God knows what I can handle, And i'll trust in that.  Suffering, waiting and persistance (143).  Things I don't do well, but plan to work on.  On pg. 146  The bottom paragraph talks about 'luminosity.'  When people glow.  I've seen people like that.  I think i've had it before, but it's been awhile since I glowed with God's glory.  I want that again.  Glow with God's love.  

Arousing Adam (9):  I haven't finished my study guides for all this chapters, so maybe my responses aren't very deep, but I'm going with first (or technically second) impressions.  "You cannot take your Question to Adam". (pg 151)  AMEN!!! Could we shout that off the rooftops?  The thing about this book is that it offers answers and thoughts, but the fixing of it is the tough, long process part.

"No man can tell you who you are as a woman." (152)

I think I might need to write that and tape it on my mirror.  Romance stories are all well and good, but that amazing ones, the women I like are the ones who realize who they are without the guy.  Those are the women that I want to be.  the ones I hope to write.  :)

Pg. 164.  Second full paragraph.  Emotionally dating, anyone?  I read that and was transported back to Taylor.  Hopefully I'm smarter, more aware now.  

Pg. 165.  being there for someone of the opposite sex without it being wrong.  Chris has done that for me.  And that's one of my favorite memories (you remember, don't you?  beginning of senior year).  I think that's why I crush easily on guys.  A guy shows me how awesome he is and I mistake it for something more.  I'm glad I know that now.  maybe I can avoid it in the future.  My dad does that for me too.  Makes me hope for a guy out there who can be a Godly man.  And even if I don't ever find one for me, that doesn't mean that those men aren't out there.

So, watch out men!  I'm here to arouse.  You know, in a good Godly woman way.  

I'm pretty sure this post is random and disconnected.  Hope it makes sense.

"Not in those trousers, my lord."

I was highly amused by my picture of Bunter physically blocking Peter from leaving on account of his pants; an actual "lol" situation (rather than the general "qstm" (quietly smiling to myself) that is still called lol).

On a serious note though, the character of Peter took a completely left turn, and my opinion of Sayers as a writer with it. While I was enjoying the book and hero at about this level (picture me holding my hand out), after the scene where Peter was having flashbacks to the Great War--wow, we're here (picture other hand much, much higher). WWI had an intense affect on not just literature but society and Western humanity writ large. To see that reflected in a character written so soon after the end of the war shouldn't have been surprising to me, but it was. I'd almost forgotten about history amidst the fun, but Sayers didn't. Now my heart aches as I see Peter's frivolity as not just emblematic of his class and personality, not just a screen to hide a clever, clever mind, but a coping mechanism to deal with the horrors of what he experienced at war. The layers that adds to his character as well as his and Bunter's relationship is incredible. No longer is it just an affectionate employer/employee mutual respect thing, but they were comrades in arms. I can only imagine how that bonds individuals when they've fought together while witnessing atrocities they can't even speak of. Wow.

Eden isn't the only one who likes this book!

As you can see, Cassie has also taken a great liking to Lord Peter. She was flipping through the pages with rapt attention for several minutes this afternoon, and it wasn't the first time she'd picked up the book! I too found myself greatly entrenched in the story this afternoon as I read the chapters. Honestly, I didn't want to put it down after chapter 9, but I forced myself to so I could post without giving anything away. (Round of applause for the great discipline this takes...) However, I'm not promising not to finish it tonight or tomorrow!

I was right!! Sir Julien Freke (maybe Freak is a better spelling?!) is involved and it sounds like he my be one sick man...don't know if anyone here knows much about vivisection but cutting up live bodies is something straight out of a horror movie, which is as most of you know, a genre I despise. I haven't figured the whole mystery out, but I think pieces started to come to me even as they were being put forth for us through the mind of Peter.

Speaking of Lord Peter, while he may have been called an arrogant jerk by certain of you, I found his character very endearing during these three chapters. Sayers did a good job with LP's insightful revelation about his hobby of sleuthing. It was very touching to me for him to reveal to Parker that being a detective was a game for him, but when it came down to being the one responsible for sending the criminal away or to his death, he struggled with that. I think I would be the same way given those circumstances, hence a new respect for him. The episode he had with his nerves was also very poignant as was the way "Sergeant" Bunter took care of him. Any chance that Bunter actually served with him in the war, hence the bond that they have and how Bunter got his position?

One final thought on Bunter, whom, of course, I still adore. He may be the manservant and Lord Peter the Lord, but it is clear who is in charge in certain matters, such as the way that Lord Peter dresses. I loved the was Bunter told him in no uncertain terms was he leaving the house for a fancy luncheon dressed in anything less than fresh and immaculate clothes!

I guess to sum it up, yay for Peter, yay for Bunter, boo for Sir Freak.